Reclaiming Childhood- A Review

Reclaiming Childhood by Dr Helene Guldberg tackles head on 'the stark consequences on child development of both our low expectations of fellow human beings and our safety obsessed culture'. Alongside a relentless society wide trend to 'protect' children from everyone and everything, a new phenomena has quietly made an appearance, a mounting unease with the increasing amount of restrictions on children's activity. This unease has been expressed in a number of ways in the media in the last eighteen months. There has been a backlash against the demise of school sports day, where there are no running races that take place as the idea of having a 'winner' is seen as too competitive and therefore wrong. There has been outcry against the well documented reports of teachers who will not step in to help injured children as they fear breaching government protocol or are simply confused as to what action to take. There has been concern about the fact that children play outside significantly less than in the recent past. Such concerns are typified by Esther Rantzen who recently claimed she had gone too far in aspects of her work trying to protect children from adults.

One of the books central points is that criticism of the process of over-protection stems from the very same set of fears that produce the problem in the first place, that of a mistrust and suspicion between adults. This unconscious approach to child over-protection will never reach the root of the problem . In the case of Rantzen's recent tour de force, she claimed to have gone 'too far' but she did not retract, or even question, the highly corrosive sentiment behind her creation Childline.

It is the insatiable need for adults to intervene in children's play that is the manifestation of a broader sense of confusion and mistrust in society. Adult insecurities are projected onto children. This is where Reclaiming Childhood really struck a chord with me. I have been a tennis coach for around fifteen years and have witnessed this phenomena firsthand. Parents will often attempt to 'explain' their child to me, often prior to the child starting tennis lessons. Parents are also far closer to their child's responses to their than in the recent past; there seems to be little sense of perspective, detached judgement or simply letting the child get on with it and allowing my coaches to teach. This tendency is highlighted beautifully in the book when Guldberg highlights the work of David Anderegg:

"By 'overthinking and overworrying', parents are 'eventually overeacting on the decision arrived at in a worried state'. Anderegg says he is regularly approached by anxious parents who have tied themselves up in knots over rather mundane questions relating to their children - the kind of things our parents never really worried about. According to Anderegg, the problem with constantly worrying about issues such as whether children should be allowed to play with toy guns is that 'the choices multiply into an infinitude of decisions that seem like they might determine the course of our children's lives.

Another tendency I have noticed both in teaching tennis and in running discussions for the Brighton Salon is the tendency to blame parents for the situation that Reclaiming Childhood describribes. Guldberg makes it a central premise to her argument that this is a fundamental error. It's not parents fault that society is obsessed with risk and with interpersonal behaviour. It is also not parents fault that adults are not trusted and that there is a whole state backed army intervening in the parent child relationship. The pressure to continually intervene in children's play and 'structure' their time is immense. The insatiable need of adults to intervene is backed by an insatiable need on the part of the state to intervene in the adult child relationship.

The book gives us some very compelling insights into the way children play and how this is totally ignored, misunderstood and distorted by the child protection industry. Modern concerns over 'toxic childhood' are taken apart by Guldberg using good old scientific analysis and data. Basically, most horror stories over childhood are made up.

My favourite chapter was on 'Bullying'. If there ever has been a 'sacred cow' in societies attitude to children, it is that childhood bullying is getting worse. I must admit to two things here, firstly that as an ex-bully myself I have little sympathy for those who claim that saying nasty things and giving out nasty looks constitute bullying. Bullying can now mean anything, as the definition of what it constitutes it depends completely on whether the victims thinks they are being bullied. Secondly, I take great sadistic pleasure in seeing the anti-bullying industry being outraged by Guldberg's point that nearly all bullying does not need intervention by adults and that this intervention itself is more harmful than bullying itself.

The best point Guldberg makes about the anti-bullying tenancy is slightly more subtle and never really alluded to by the anti-bullying industry:

"Children are not emotionally scarred by the experience, they move on. Once the experience is labelled as 'bullying', however, and a teacher becomes involved, it becomes an issue of much greater significance, driving a more permanent wedge between the putative victim and that week's bullies, and making it far harder for the spontaneous dynamics of playground life to resolve themselves."

This book is well written, insightful and timely. As one who wants to turn the tide and turn our back on this age of fear and suspicion I would recommend this book to everyone. For this reason the Brighton Salon are holding a meeting on Wednesday, February 25th at 7.30pm at Bellerbys College Brighton. Helene Guldberg will be introducing the key concepts in her book and you will be given a chance to question her and debate with other members of the Salon. If you would like to attend please contact me now dantravisbrightonsalon@googlemail.com